Have You Been Seen? Seeing Is Healing
Do you need a functional MD?
We all want to be seen. This "being seen" is a big part of actual healing. The Ancient Greeks knew this. They created the theatron, the seeing place, where audiences could enjoy seeing a hero recognize their own flaws or a prodigal is welcomed home and embraced as fully human. These cathartic moments of recognition are designed to heal. They provide us with an emotional experience full of empathy. They hand us back our humanity. Theatre is a kind of medicine.
We all know what it's like not to be seen, to be projected upon, to be ignored, to be mistaken for another or to be taken for granted. We all know what it's like to be considered representative of our kind, or objectified, or made into a number or a statistic. We might call it our current healthcare system. This is where functional MDs come in.
The rise of functional medicine is one answer to a medical system of specialization. Functional medicine incorporates a holistic approach to health while practicing actual medicine often beyond established protocols (and typically beyond what insurance pays for). The word health comes from the idea of wholeness, and the functional approach means to see the person as a whole.
I’ve seen several functional MDs along my healing journey, 3 as a patient, and I’ve studied with a functional MD for various certificates for my coaching practice to understand the biology of trauma and how/why we get sick (in particular sick with autoimmune diseases and chronic illness). Several of you asked me to say more about functional MDs, so here goes. Functional MDs are great if
you’re clear about your objectives
you have a budget and boundaries
you actually need a functional MD
When I got out of the hospital in 2014 after 3 weeks of steroids, morphine and starvation (and 6 weeks prior to that of sickness at home), no one had actually addressed the issues of my pain and inflammation. They refused to test me for parasites or bacteria, and they only wanted to treat me with biologics. These are chemo-level drugs that have significant, scary side effects. While I am not against anyone taking whatever drugs they need, I personally didn't want to take them.
Instead I found a functional MD who did an hour-long intake going over every system of my body and how it was functioning. Every time I went to her office, I filled out a long questionnaire in detail. She did extensive testing, found the bugs causing my inflammation and pain, and we spent about 4 months killing them without antibiotics. It was slow, complicated (involving charts), yet gentle. It allowed me to repopulate my gut with better bacteria and actually heal. She offered me access to private testing labs and very personal care. I spent about $5k there (10 years ago). None of it reimbursible.
I believe I would have died without her. So yes, if you are at the end of your rope, I think functional MDs are amazing and worth debt. But also consider that trauma is a huge factor. Functional MDs are trained to be trauma-informed. They take all of you into account. They will see you deeply. This seeing can be very healing. But you can find this kind of seeing and healing in other practitioners. You might first try all the less expensive things.
artwork by Scott Sherman on instagram at ScottShermanStudio
I come from a long line of women who screamed, cried and carried on “making scenes.” They were often called “hysterical.” This is misogyny. It’s not a mother’s fault if she can’t calm her nervous system. We don’t live in a world where mothers are ever supported enough. And if a baby can’t be calmed because the mother is suffering, then that baby will learn to calm their mother. That’s how biology works. We are relational beings. We become people pleasers, hello autoimmune disease…
If we can’t clear our stress, if we can’t reset our nervous system because we were never taught how, because our mothers weren’t taught this either, we need to stop ignoring our own deep needs and give ourselves a real chance to heal.
If you are living with anxiety that is so ubiquitous, you don’t even notice it, or you are aware and unable to settle yourself, or you’ve developed chronic illness and/or chronic pain, you can heal. I have done it. And it didn’t take a fortune or forever once I realized what was going on. It begins with a moment of recognition. You need to be seen.
And you need to see yourself. Once I realized I had to find ways to regulate my nervous system, I began to heal. I’m not saying it’s an easy, simple thing to do, but it is possible. I offer both private and group sessions that address this.
Writing Prompt:
“The scene is memory and is therefore non-realistic. Memory takes a lot of poetic license. It omits some details; others are exaggerated, according to the emotional values of the articles it touches, for memory is seated predominantly in the heart. The interior is therefore rather dim and poetic.” ---Tennessee WilliamsThe quote above is part of the description Williams gives us for The Glass Menagerie. Let’s use this for our own purposes. Write a memory scene or a flashback.
You can allow it to be non-realistic. You have permission to take as much poetic license as you need. You can show things happening internally through movement (he says I love you, and she moves toward the window), activity (she asks him where he disappeared to, and he pours himself a drink), what is important (give yourself an object, a portrait, a favorite dress, a locket, something) to imbue with emotional values, what are the details you want to emphasize (hint at something of your theme, a loss, a secret, a longing), and what are the details you want to hide? What do you want to plant for later, and what do you want to leave so obvious we might forget it’s there, get used to it, and then get surprised by it later?
If the scene is a memory, and memory exists in the heart, then the memory doesn’t need to be precise. It can be foggy or hazy. It can be remembered one way by one character, and one way by another. It can shift like dreams shift. You can use non-sequitur. You can work with rhythms and tempos.
Let the scene of this memory become a kind of dance between the characters. Who starts with the power and how does it shift and change? How many reversals can occur in the scene? What is its journey?
If the scene is dim, as Williams suggests, then what does the dim light conceal? Make sure you are aware of it even if the characters aren’t yet.
If the scene is poetic then what are the rules of the language, the world, the culture and how do you invite the audience (or reader if you’re using this to write a story in prose)?
What does the heart need? How does the heart beat in the scene?
Announcements:
Brave Group Coaching New Cohort Forming! I’ll be offering a new 6 week Introduction to Your Nervous System. Enjoy better Self-Regulation with somatic exercises and IFS-informed parts work starting Tuesday, September 10th from 7pm to 830pm ET via Zoom. This is a slow and gentle approach to help you access greater capacity to be present and to heal from chronic illness, chronic pain and trauma. As an Audhd person myself, I welcome all neurotypes. More Info Here
Saturday, August 24th at 4pm at Summit Rock for FREE! in Central Park! Jefferson Reardon will be performing as Mercutio in Shakespeare Unrehearsed! Barefoot Shakespeare Company takes on Needs More Work Productions in a two hour extravaganza of live-theatre magic mixed with the hilarious hijinks of hoping actors will mess up! The performance is free, but betting on and tipping the performers is highly encouraged! All performances are at Summit Rock in Central Park (B/C to American Museum of Natural History/81st street).
Adam Gottlieb is offering a Poetry and Songwriting Workshop: Irresistible Revolution on Radical Imagination and Vision will take place in Chicago Tuesday August 27th 5-8pm CT in person. Please share with the songwriters and poets you know in the Chicago area.
Deadline September 1st! Woodward/Newman Award at Constellations, you can send 2 full-length plays including TYA. More info here
Deadline September 8th! YALE DRAMA AWARD More info here
Due by Friday September 13th! Apply to the Jam at New Georges (for NYC-based or able to travel to NYC easily 2x/month for 2 years, women+ theatre artists) For information click here. And for the application click here.
I highly recommend Gina Femia's Novel-Writing Workshop!
October 7th, New Harmony applications for Playwriting Residencies are due!
Jenna Lourenco is looking for Autistic Theatre People for a study Examining Environmental & Cultural Challenges to Autistic Accessibility in Theatre Workspaces" through the end of October 2024 at this link!
Holistic/ functional psychiatry has transformed my life. The gentleness & being seen and BELIEVED. Oh yes. That is one of the best parts.